One Year Anniversary

As I'm sitting here eating my breakfast, I think on all the good times I've had with Jay Kinzie in the past year. We've had a few rough patches, but we always manage to pull through. I wish we could be together today to celebrate all our hard work from the last year, but later today we are going to have a good video call and share some Toblerone. I'm looking forward to this with great happiness. :)

We started as just a simple conversation late at night one year ago. Neither one of us could sleep and hadn't talked to the other in four months. We ended up spending all night together and most of the next day. Then we messaged each other endlessly until we got to be together again. Sometime during that period of messages we became a couple.We knew our relationship would be hard because we lived five hours apart, but that didn't stop us from boldly beginning one. Nearly all of my long breaks from Rose were spent with Jay. Sometimes he came to me and sometimes I came to him, but we did everything we could to make great memories.

Over fall break, Jay met my dad. It was a slightly awkward meeting, but everything worked out great. Dad approved, and I was the happiest I had been in years. During that break, Jay and I went to the Indianapolis Children's Museum. Like all visitors to that amazing place, Jay loved the water clock and the glass sculpture in the stairwell. Our very first picture together was taken in the basement next to the train engine. We played checkers too, and I lost horribly. I even tried to change to rules to help me and still lost. Jay was just too sharp for me to outwit. Sometime around Fall Break, I can't remember before or after, Jay got Jess and Dawn. They are the sweetest kitties in the whole world.

Thanksgiving brought it's own set of memories and crazy stories. I had survived finals with minimal damage, and Jay was staying with Mike that week so he was easy for me to talk to. Jay got to meet my entire family at our annual Thanksgiving Dinner. It was delicious as usual, and everyone seemed to love him. We played Phase 10 after the meal, and Jay was cheating! Dakota brought me the paddle because she didn't like seeing him cheat. I chased him around with it a little bit, but he was too quick and strong for me to catch. He ended up catching me and showering me in kisses. It was super sweet, like all the things Jay does to me.

After the three worst weeks I've ever had at Rose, it was time to take Christmas Break. Since I no longer had a roommate, Jay had spent most of those three weeks in my room keeping me entertained. We spent the first four or five days of break with my family and then went up to Chicago. It was my first time ever in Chicago, and I had a great time. Jay's family didn't waste any time showing their weird quirks. The first memory I have of Ellen is of her freaking out because I had pierced ears and she didn't. She still has a lot of growing to do. I met most of Jay's family and friends over that break. Jay's parents took us and Ellen into downtown Chicago on Christmas Eve for their family tradition of eating at the Walnut Room and walking through the Christmas Market. I think I even forgot my hot coco glass at their house. It was so magical. It would have been better without the cold rain, but still quite magical. Jay and I got an amazing kissing picture in front of the huge Christmas Tree that was sitting in the middle of the market. After returning home that night, we turned the TV to a Christmas movie marathon and got out the Champagne. It was definitely a night I will never forget. The next day Jay's dad took pictures of us together. They turned out amazing, and I have one sitting on my desk right now. I took the picture that they would use for their annual Christmas Card. It was really cool to get that in the mail. Jay's mom tried to cook dinner, but she has an issue with cooking, and it didn't quite turn out. It was still pretty tasty though. Jay took me to a New Year's Party at Emily's house. Jay's old friends are quite unique. I don't really know how to describe them, but I will probably never forget them. They are just too different to blend into the background. I wasn't very social at that party because I felt like crap, but I wanted to go anyways so Jay took me. I was glad that I went. We got to share a kiss right as the year changed. It was so romantic.

About two weeks later Jay moved out of his parent's house and into a nearby apartment because his kitties were harming his mom's business. I drove up to Chicago by myself for the first time ever, and the weather was terrible. I was so glad that I came though. It was fantastic to be able to help him start a new phase in his life. I have so many memories in that apartment. For the next six months we took turns driving that horribly boring stretch of road between Terre Haute and Chicago. We got to spend every other weekend or at least every third weekend together and all of our long breaks. It probably wasn't so good for our relationships with friends, but it was very good for us as a couple.

After Rose was finished for the year, I moved in with Jay. It was the best choice I ever made. All the love and joy and happiness of the summer of 2010 cannot be captured in words. Brickworld was a unique experience, but I loved it. I am just as much of a Lego fan as Jay. I have just run out of time to really build things. Jay always has a table though so one day I will be able to build something and put it on display for children to admire. We went to many cool places, and shared the long drive to Colorado. Colorado is an amazing place, and I would love to go back there and live. Our weekend at Joyful Journey was amazing. I will definitely be spending more time at spas in the future. While in Colorado we both made promises to get into shape once and for all. We talked to Dr. Cooper and figured out what needed to happen, and we have done quite well so far. Jay is the thinnest he has ever been in his recent memory, and I'm the thinnest I have been since I was ten. We are making phenomenal progress. We tried to teach his kitties how to walk on leashes. It didn't really go over very well, but we did try. We took a really awesome city tour of Chicago and got to ride on a double-decker bus. Jay and I made JayBear in the last weeks of summer, and I'm so glad we did.

At the end of the summer I had to follow through with something that I thought would be great. I chose to study abroad and had to leave my family, friends, and most of all Jay for an entire year. Since I've come here, I've been wondering if it really was the right decision for me. I honestly don't know if it was or not, but I do know that I am totally in love with Jay. If this first month here has taught me anything, it's that I love Jay endlessly and there is nothing that can change that fact. Four thousand miles has not made me love him any less. In fact, it has made me love him more and wish that this year will pass quickly. I am glad that I have JayBear with me. He keeps me company when Jay is not here. I sleep in Jay's superman sweatshirt. I love having that thing. I have a picture of us and a letter from him on my desk. I got so used to Jay buying me flowers at random times that I even had to buy a pot of roses. I love putting my shoes on every day and knowing that the red stains came from our time in Colorado. I love knowing that my sun glasses were bought one spring day when I was driving to go see Jay. Before I left, Jay snuck a Lego piece onto my keyring. I carry that with me every day and the keys to his apartment even though he will have moved by the time I get back. I even carry my cellphone around, even though it's not very useful anymore, just so I can have pictures of Jay in my hand. JayBear goes with me almost everywhere, and even though people laugh, I still bring him. I wear a different necklace from Jay every day. The webcam I use to talk to Jay and everyone else was a gift from him back in January. Most of what I brought with me, reminds me of Jay or is from Jay. :) Most days I cry because I miss him so much, but I know I will be in his arms again. That single truth is what drives me to keep moving forward every day because each day that passes is one day closer to being reunited with my love.

We will be together in Zwolle, Holland on October 22nd. I am very excited and cannot wait to see him. I will probably jump on him, and I know that I will hug him so tight it hurts my arms. It will only be for three short days, but we are still getting valuable time together. Jay is coming to see me for Christmas. He will be here for about three weeks. I am so excited that I might explode. I'm trying to plan lots of cool places for us to visit. We will definitely be going to a New Year's Eve Party, although here it's called Silvester. All the same, it will still be great fun. Hopefully, I can visit Jay in the break between my semesters or over spring break. I really would love to do that. Time is passing quicker than I thought it would, and I know I will be in his arms again before I realize it. Until then though, I have to go to classes, learn things, pass exams, and take lots of pictures. There are only 25 days until I get to see Jay in Zwolle!

<3 Jess

Daily Activites

So Jay was bugging me to post something, and I couldn't think of anything. So I'm just going to tell you about what I do every day.

For starters, you should remember that I am 6 hours ahead of Eastern Daylight Time. I try to get up around 7 or 8 am and eat some breakfast. I don't really have anything to do, but I can't sleep all day either. Some days I go shopping at Kaufland for groceries. Once in a while I do laundry, but usually I just sit around and waste time on facebook. I eat some sort of lunch and then head to class. I have to ride the S-Bahn (subway) and the H42 (bus) to get to my classes. It takes about 25 minutes. I could also skip the bus and walk now that I know which way to go. I have class every day from 1:30-7pm. I also have homework, but the homework isn't really hard. Just annoying. Learning vocabulary is frustrating.There are two fifteen minute breaks during my five hour German class. It's rather frustrating to be there that long every day. I come home and make dinner if I'm hungry. Lately I've been making a lot of soups. They are easy, cheap, and reasonably healthy. Around the same time that I'm eating dinner, I usually talk to Jay. He has a couple free hours in the middle of the day that we use for chatting with Skype.

Today I did some letter writing and some laundry.

33 Days

I get to see Jay in 33 days. I'm super excited about that. I'm really anxious to see him again.

I went on a trip this last weekend to Neckarsteinach and Heidelberg. Both cities are very pretty. I took over 600 photos. They are amazing. I need to remember to stand still when taking pictures though. When I am walking, they always turn out blurry. My photography skills seem to be improving. I'm liking that a lot.

Today is my roommate's birthday. We are having a party tonight. That shall be fun. I learned how to clean our apartment today, and how to use the washing machine. Now I just need to find the machine to put money on my laundry card.

Mariana and I started planning Christmas trips. Group tickets are cheaper, and we are both having guests. We decided that we would go places together for Christmas this year. I'm excited about that, and I get to see Jay for Christmas! I'm going to love seeing him for so long. We have hit some rough spots, but I know we can make it through this and come out on the other side better than we started.

I'm getting better with the language. I can place an order at a bakery and a cafe with no problems. I can go shopping pretty easily. I have my first test tomorrow afternoon. I'm hoping that goes well. I need to go back to studying though.

<3 Jess

....

Today was a giant shit sandwich. No I will not elaborate. I just feel awful in every way possible. I have no way of fixing it either, so I guess I just endure in this miserable state.

Frustrations and Triumphs

So I tried to do the online banking thing with my bank account here. Well I messed it up, and now I have to go to the bank on Monday and get help. I couldn't understand the instructions very well and got myself locked out of my account. Yay! While I'm there I might as well get help with my debit card too, since I haven't tried to use it yet.

I got a pot of pink roses last week. They are doing quite well. Full of blooms. I'm making friends. My language course is going well. I've been taking lots of pictures of things. JayBear goes everywhere I do, except the grocery store. I need the space in my bag so I can bring the groceries home, otherwise he would go there too. I got a picture from for the most awesome picture of me and Jay. It's nice to be able to look at it again. Jay and I get to talk to each other nearly every day. I'm so glad for technology. It would be so much harder to do long distance without computers. As soon as I can speak reasonably well, I think I'm going to get my hair dyed red. I've been wanting red hair for a while. I'm still listening to Christmas music, but I also got out the Halloween music since I will see Jay at the end of October. I'm so excited for that.

Oh, I did get registered with everyone that I can at this point. I have to wait until the end of the month to register with the Uni.

I need to go help my roommates make dinner. We are making a Ukrainian dish today. I can't remember what it's called. Two days ago we had Spaetzele, a kind of noodle, with a mushroom cream sauce and chicken. It was awesome. I had a cheesy pretzel for lunch on Thursday. It was so good. Anna got me to try toast with jam and cheese. Sounds odd, but tastes great.

First Days

Well, I made it to Germany alive and well. I've been filling out paperwork and standing in lines since I got here. I'm missing my family and friends very much. I'm missing Jay so much more than everyone else. I've been wondering if I should have even come here in the last couple of days. It's so hard to be away from Jay and everyone else. I found a white cat hair on my shirt yesterday, and it made me cry because I miss Jay and his kitties so much. Then I found out that Jay wants to give his cats away to someone else. That was just the cherry on top of my sundae of crap for the week. I hope things start to get better. I'm having a hard time functioning with all the hurt of being away from Jay and his kitties. And then to think that I may never get to see his kitties again, it makes everything seem even worse. I've started listening to Christmas music in hopes that Christmas will get here quicker so that Jay and I can be together again.

 My room is very empty here. I feel like I've been uprooted. I don't like that at all. I have made a couple friends though. Anna is from Australia and we've been doing lots of things together since we met. Mariana is from Mexico, and she lives close to Anna. I've met lots of people from lots of places, but I don't have a phone yet so it's hard to keep in touch with any of them. Anna and I had lunch with Mariana today.  Anna and I went walking in the forest preserve today. It was really nice. I had to take a picture of the corn field we walked past because it made me feel a little more at home.

I start my language class tomorrow. I need it more than I thought I would. I went to the store earlier this week and was stumbling all over myself. If Anna had not been there, I wouldn't have been able to find what I wanted. I'm glad most of the offices that I need to go to in my first few days speak English.

My flat mates are nice. I don't know all their names yet though. I can talk to Alex, but the girl from Ukraine doesn't speak English, and my German is terrible so I can't talk to her very well. I haven't met the third girl yet.

Well, I've had enough for one day. I think I'm going to try to get some sleep on that hard thing that is supposed to be my bed.